Recovery and Relapse

Part Three of V- The L.A. Chronicles. (Section 2 of 3)

by Jackie Newman

jacalynsue@zoominternet.net

Ted strode purposefully to the shuttle, steeling himself for what was to come. He’d delayed as long as he could, though, and Darlene had to be told. His resolve faltered when he reached the ramp. He took one step, hesitated, and sat down. Leaning his elbows on his knees, he put his head in his hands and closed his eyes. He was chafing under the yoke of command and his efforts to hide it were becoming more and more transparent. He wasn’t qualified to be leading a resistance movement, and his wartime experience was more limited than he thought it should be. 

He envied Megan. She seemed so self-assured, so confident in her own abilities. If Ted had been asked to visit bookstores and public libraries with Jackie, to mingle among the humans as if he were one of them, he would have been intimidated by the daunting task. But Megan had shown no signs of trepidation before leaving with Jackie this morning.

As much as he liked the humans, Ted didn’t know how to BE one, and wondered if he ever would. Especially if Jackie was typical of humans. Jackie was very erratic in temperament, shifting from one mood to another without warning. He’d never be able to do that.

How had Karen managed? Kim, he corrected himself.

Not once had he ever suspected she was human. It amazed him that she had been so convincing in her part that not even her friend of many years had penetrated through the disguise to the distraught woman underneath the mask. 

It was certain to be awkward when Kim returned, but Ted wanted to move beyond that. There was so much he could learn from her, so many things he wanted to know. She had always been kind, and he couldn’t let himself believe that had all been an act. She had helped them in so many ways, yet she had done it without ever drawing attention to herself. Surely the money her supposed “contact” had supplied them with was really her own. Kim’s “curiosity” about the contents of the surrounding buildings was most likely another planned move. Why else would she have suggested looking, unless she knew there would be furnishings available to make them more comfortable? She’d even expressed a belief that the human rebels would assist them in the transition to life on Earth when the fighting was over, should any of them choose to stay. In retrospect, had she really been telling them that her own loyalty to them would continue after the masks came off? It seemed a reasonable assumption.

He wondered if she would ever have confided in them had Alan not been shot. Darlene was the reason she had kept her silence, based on the letter. But Kim must know by now that the rest of them could be trusted to stand by her even after they knew her blood was red. How would she have broached the subject, he wondered. Even now, she was probably uneasy about the reception she would get when she returned. Yet in spite of the risks, knowing Darlene would react unfavorably, she had placed Alan’s welfare before her own.

Darlene was a problem he had to deal with and he couldn’t put it off any longer. He’d already questioned her about what had happened yesterday and been convinced they were in no immediate danger. Blaine had gone back to where she said they were attacked and found three human bodies lying in an alley. They could remain at the soundstage, which meant they didn’t have to abandon the shuttle.

Now he had to decide how to deal with Darlene. Kim had earned the right to rejoin them. And it would not be fair to allow Darlene’s offensive treatment of Jackie to expand to include Kim. Actually, he should have curtailed Darlene’s behavior long ago. But away from the ship, he had no real authority. They were working together out of necessity, deferring to rank out of courtesy, and struggling to survive. Could he realistically give Darlene an ultimatum? Could he enforce it if her behavior didn’t improve? Would the others agree to banish her back to Paul, to make her someone else’s problem, all for the sake of a human? What would someone like Martin do?

Ted perked up at that thought. Surely Martin had known who Kim was. Yet he had protected her, told Paul to watch for her arrival on the surface, and trusted her with vital fifth column information. Ted had his answer after all. Martin was the leader of the fifth column and he had protected Kim. The fifth columnists who served under him could do no less. Darlene would either comply or be asked to leave. Feeling more confident than he had for days, Ted rose to his feet and made his way into the sleeping compartment of the shuttle. 

It was a relief to find Darlene awake. He could get this confrontation over with and return his attention to the war effort. He folded up the middle bunk on the side opposite Darlene and sat down on the lower one. “I want to talk to you about Karen.”

“So talk.” She didn’t bother to look at him, she just continued to stare at the bottom of the bunk above her.

“Some things happened yesterday that you are unaware of.”

“I can tell already I don’t want to hear this,” Darlene groused.

“Probably not. But I’m going to tell you anyway. And if you decide to leave, you can go back to Paul with our full support. Perhaps another surface unit would be more to your liking.”

“I doubt it.”

“You despise the humans. Other units will probably not have humans living with them.” Ted was trying hard to be patient and managed to keep his voice calm.

Darlene’s face held a wary expression. “Quit procrastinating. What happened yesterday?”

“Karen is human.”

Darlene bolted upright and stood in front of him, glaring. Her jaw worked, but she said nothing, rendered speechless by Ted’s proclamation.

He looked up at her as she loomed over him. “It’s true. Her name is Kim. Without her, Alan would have bled to death. She took him back to her house where she has supplies she believed could save him. Damian and Jacob went with her. You should also know that Jacob’s assigned name is really Philip. He helped Kim infiltrate the fleet several months ago. 

“Ifr Alan lives, it will be because of what she did for him. She also assessed your injuries, which is to her credit, given the way you have behaved. If it had been necessary, she would have treated you as well.”

Darlene was incredulous. She paced in the narrow space between the bunks. “You mean to tell me one of those stupid apes has been pretending to be one of us all this time?”

“Given her success, I hardly think she is stupid. She even fooled you,” Ted replied. “Kim will be returning with the others in a few days. Regardless of whether Alan survives, I am confident she did her best to help him. She will be staying here, and you will be civil with her. And I expect you to start being civil to Jackie as well. We’ve all tolerated your contempt for far too long and it won’t be tolerated any more. While I don’t expect you to be friendly, you will be polite, or you will be sent back to Paul for reassignment. Do I make myself clear?”

Darlene lay back down on the bunk, feigning indifference. “You have no authority over me, Ted.”

Ted stood up, his posture uncompromising. His hands were clasped behind his back, as much to keep from hitting her as to add to the image of authority he wanted to project. For once, he felt equal to the responsibilities of his rank. “On the contrary, I have full authority. I also have the backing of everyone else. You will comply or you will leave. But you will not be permitted to torment the humans any longer. Kim’s pregnancy has been difficult enough and I won’t have you adding to the strain she is under with your malicious comments. Jackie also has suffered with them for far too long, and I’m putting a stop to it. I expect to have your decision by this time tomorrow.”

* * * *

 “Ted.”

Ted was halfway to the office when he heard Darlene call him. He stopped and turned, fully expecting an argument. 

“I want to be reassigned.”

He nodded, surprised by the pain in her eyes. He took a step towards her. “Why won’t you let us help you?”

The pain vanished, to be replaced by the coldness he was accustomed to seeing. “Why do you insist on believing I need help?” She looked away and the defensive tone slipped from her voice. “I want to leave now.”

“I’ll take you,” Ted acquiesced. “Pack your belongings while I inform the others.” He watched her nod to herself, then disappear into the shuttle.

* * * *

They drove in silence. She stared out the window on the passenger side, not even trying to cover her sour mood.

Ted left her alone until he had parked the car and removed the key from the ignition, then took her arm to keep her from getting out. She stiffened in his grasp and directed a glare at him, but stayed in her seat. “If you decide later that leaving was a mistake, you can always come back.”

“As long as I worship the humans like you do.”

“No.” Ted shook his head, long weary of the argument. “As long as you keep your prejudice contained.” He let go of her arm, holding her with his gaze. “What happened to you, Darlene?”

She rolled her eyes and reached for the door handle. When they had both closed their doors, she looked across the roof of the car at him. “Don’t even try to understand, okay? You did your best to reform me, and I relieve you of all responsibility for me.”

Ted stood mutely watching her as she shouldered her bag and turned her back on him. He followed her, keeping a few paces between them, and bit back a curse as she shut the door behind her just as he reached it. Anger burned away his residual sympathy and he mentally absolved himself of any remaining obligations concerning her. It was a relief to know she was going to be someone else’s problem from now on. He turned the knob and swung the door open. As he stepped inside, he shut the door and removed his sunglasses in one fluid movement.

“Ted?” Angel appeared in the other doorway to the room and looked at him with a furrowed brow. She quickly crossed the room and shook his hand in greeting, human style. “Is something wrong?” She hooked her left thumb over her shoulder, pointing towards a corridor. “Is that bundle of joy that just blew through with you?”

“Hi, Angel,” he greeted her. 

She let him pull her close and kiss her cheek. He kept an arm around her waist, and she waited patiently for him to pull away. Instead, he surprised her when he put his forehead on her shoulder. “Hey, it’s okay.” She patted his back comfortingly and he finally straightened.

“That ‘bundle of joy’ is Darlene,” Ted said belatedly.

She pursed her lips. “Oooh. The infamous Darlene! I missed meeting her when she was here last time. Don’t you worry, we’ve dealt with plenty of her type before. Down here, there ain’t nothing we don’t see. If she tries to be aloof and irritable, the gals will work together to make her miserable. All it takes is a little kindness; we’ll get her snarling back at us in no time.”

Some of the strain left his face and he smiled at her. “Is Paul here?”

“Honey, where else would he be?” Angel looped her arm through his and led him towards Paul’s dingy office. “We weren’t expecting you today, but it’s convenient you came when you did. Are you okay? Did something happen?”

“Yes, but we’ll be fine.”

“Getting rid of Darlene makes everything easier, hmm?” she teased.

“I wish it were that simple.”

“If life were simple, honey, I’d be out of a job,” she chided while she knocked on the door. 

“Come in,” Paul called through the door.

Angel opened it and stepped to the side so Ted could go in, then shut it quietly behind him. 

“Ted, I didn’t expect to see you today,” Paul said, rising to his feet. He offered his hand and Ted clasped it gratefully. “I was getting ready to send a message to you. This is Anthony.” Paul gestured to the fifth columnist who was sitting near them. “We still don’t have a doctor, but Anthony’s almost as good, since he has some medical training.”

“Conversion technician,” Anthony supplied as he stood and offered his hand. “Paul told me about Karen and I’d like to help.”

Ted looked from Anthony to Paul. This was ludicrous! 

“Ted?” Paul grew concerned. “Karen’s okay, isn’t she?”

“She’s human. Does that make her okay?” Ted blurted, sinking into an empty chair. “Alan’s been shot, and I’m dumping Darlene here with you.” He leaned forward and put his head in his hands. “How much longer until the war is over?”

Paul and Anthony exchanged a worried look before looking back at Ted. “Ted, what happened?” Paul inquired.

“I don’t know. Yesterday morning, everything was fine.” He shook his head, fighting the disbelief that threatened to overwhelm him whenever he thought about the last twenty-four hours. Maybe if he told someone else about it, it would somehow make sense. “Karen was monitoring the radio, Darlene and Alan were on assignment across the city....”

* * * *

When Ted finished, he leaned his head back against the wall and shut his eyes. Talking had drained him, forced him to see the memories in a new light. All along, the subtle hints had been there, hidden in plain sight. He couldn’t decide if he should feel like a fool or be awed by her success.

“I’ll keep Darlene here,” Paul finally said. “She can’t be permitted to spread this information around.” He sighed and leaned back in his chair. Was it any wonder Ted felt burdened with this information? “We need Martin too much for her to defame him. What was he thinking when he agreed to help her?”

Anthony stood up to stretch. “It doesn’t matter. Kim needs our help. I don’t care how resourceful and clever she is, this has to be frightening for her.”

Ted stared at the ceiling, thinking again about the letter Megan had read. “And she never let it show. Maybe Martin agreed to assist her for the same reason we are: because she’s been so helpful, yet asked for nothing in return.”

Paul nodded. “Did you know it was Karen who suggested setting up with the prostitutes?” 

Anthony and Ted looked at him in surprise.

“Martin mentioned it when he first shared the idea with me,” Paul added in response to their stunned looks.

Anthony shook his head. “Then we owe her more than any of us thought. Without the network you’ve set up on the surface...” He let the thought go unfinished. They were already painfully aware of the good luck that let them reach the surface alive. Without the network to sustain them, even those few survivors would have most likely perished.

Anthony sat back down and continued. “Paul, I think you should perpetuate the image that Darlene is mentally unstable. If she rambles on about humans posing as Visitors, suggest to the women that they should disregard it.”

“Agreed.” Paul looked at Ted. “I suspect within a few days, Darlene is going to question the wisdom of requesting a reassignment.”

“I already told her she can come back, on the condition she be civil,” Ted said quietly. He fervently hoped she would stay with Paul.

“Based on her prior visit here, I would say that civility is not in her vocabulary,” Paul observed. “And she has far too much pride to admit she made a mistake.” He toyed with the pencil cup that sat on the desk in front of him. “The women are going to make me pay for foisting Darlene onto them like this. I’m never going to hear the end of it.”

“It’s for a good cause,” Anthony suggested helpfully. “I’m sure you can handle it.” 

Paul looked at him wryly. “I’m going to refrain from commenting on the direction of your thoughts.” As much as he liked the women he now lived with, he preferred to confine sexual relations to his own species. If that meant he was prejudiced, so be it.

“Why? Kim and Martin already proved it’s possible.” Anthony grinned. “Ted, anything you want to add?”

“No,” Ted responded gruffly. He didn’t have the energy to see beyond the immediate problems Kim’s revelation had caused.

“Then let’s get going. I’d like to see if I can help Jackie while we wait for the others to rejoin your group.”

“Do you think you can?” Paul asked.

Anthony shrugged. “I don’t know. No one has ever tried to reverse the conversion process before, as far as I know. But she wasn’t completely converted, so it may be possible to help her fight the effects. It can’t hurt to try.” He got to his feet and waited for Ted to stand before opening the door. He glanced at Paul and smiled. “Have fun with Darlene.”

* * * *

 “What are all of these?” Philip asked as he relieved Kim of several thick books when she appeared in the doorway to the lab. Damian was right behind her and equally burdened.

“Photographs.” 

“Of what?” Alan asked as he watched Philip and Damian unload their cargo onto the lab bench. 

“Me. My family. Places I’ve been. I figure it’s better than counting the ceiling tiles in here.”

“Seventy-three.” Philip proclaimed, thinking back to his early, boring days in these rooms before he had agreed to help her.

“You just made my case for me,” Kim countered with a smile as she pulled a chair out to sit on. The stools made her back ache these days. “Though if I really wanted to bore you, I’d bring all of them down.”

“There are more?” Alan asked

“Many more,” Damian remarked absently, thinking momentarily of the cabinet Kim had removed the albums from. They had brought barely a third of them downstairs. His attention was already directed to the first page of the album Kim had said contained her baby pictures. A tiny round face looked back at him across the years. “That’s you?”

Kim glanced at the image to be sure, then nodded. “So I’ve been told.”

Alan shifted on the bed, clearly wanting to see. Damian pulled his stool over so he and Alan could go through the pictures together. Philip, too, yielded to curiosity and moved over beside Damian. Kim suppressed a victory grin and scooted her own chair closer so she could see the pictures that evoked their questions. While she watched them pour over the photographs, she nibbled tentatively on some crackers she’d found in a cupboard upstairs. The tension in the air had completely disappeared and that pleased her more than she could put into words.

* * * *

Jackie threw down the midwife book she had been reading and massaged the back of her neck. She and Megan had returned a short time ago from a semi-successful trip to bookstores in the area. The libraries had been heavily guarded by Visitor patrols, causing the pair to eschew them for bookstores. Unfortunately, the books for sale were written mainly for expectant women in the care of a physician, and they were sorely lacking in advice for the two would-be birthing attendants who were reading them. But as Megan had pointed out, what they had found was better than nothing. At least this way, Megan would get some background in human reproduction that she could compare to her own experience. Not that Megan had told her anything about her child. No matter how Jackie had tried to gently broach the subject, Megan had refused to discuss it. She hadn’t even clarified how many children she had given birth to!

Megan had been aware of Jackie’s short temper all day, so she set aside the book she had been reading. “You’re still angry.” 

Jackie’s head snapped up in response to the accusation. “No!” She bowed her head again, staring at her foot as she traced patterns on the concrete with the toe of her shoe. “Hurt. Do you know what it does to you inside when you find out your friend of many years doesn’t trust you? I’ve known Kim for over twelve years. Twelve years. And she couldn’t even tell me where she was.” Jackie got up and began to pace.

“You’re angry.” Megan repeated her assessment of Jackie’s mood.

“I should be. But deep down, I know she did what she had to do.”

Megan watched her, wondering if she dared verbalize her own opinion regarding the source of Jackie’s anguish. Then again, given Jackie’s mood, what could it hurt? “You’re disturbed that your friend is carrying a hybrid child and wants your unconditional support. It bothers you that you may be asked to care for such a child, but know you must to maintain your friendship with Kim.”

Jackie gaped at her. “Are you accusing me of being prejudiced? After everything you and I have been through together?” She turned and stomped away. “I don’t believe I’m hearing this from you!”

“Friendship with us doesn’t bother you, no. But I’m not talking about simple friendship here, not as you humans define it.” 

“And what exactly is that supposed to mean?” Jackie whirled around and glared at Megan. “For your information, just because I haven’t slept with everyone here doesn’t make me a bigot! God, Megan, you make it sound like only whores can be open-minded!”

“That’s not what I mean and you know it,” Megan replied calmly. Jackie’s reaction only confirmed her theory. Obviously, it was a truth about herself that Jackie was not yet ready to face.

“Then what exactly do you mean? It’s not like you to be vague, Megan.”

“Your culture is rather skittish about discussing certain issues,” Megan hedged.

“That never stopped you before. What has gotten into you?”

Megan ignored the dig. “It bothers you to think about Kim sleeping with a Sirian. Especially one you know, like Philip.”

Jackie just stared at her, incredulous.

“Why not admit it, at least to yourself? That’s what has been bothering you since yesterday, isn’t it? Having to rethink past events in a new way? Seeing your friend give up one set of values in an effort to embrace a different culture? Given the changes in her life, and her need for your acceptance, you feel trapped. You don’t know how to respond, so you lash out in anger.”

“Leave the psychoanalysis to the shrinks, okay? You haven’t even been on the planet a year, and you claim to be able to understand a friendship forged in circumstances you can’t even imagine. Stick to biology, Megan. Diana already made fantastic progress in screwing up my mind, I don’t need you to finish the job.” Jackie snarled and stalked away.

Megan watched her go, and kept further observations to herself.

* * * *

 “Kim, go take a nap.” 

Philip’s voice penetrated the fog surrounding her mind. Had she almost dozed off? She straightened up and suppressed a yawn. She shook her head. “I’m fine.”

“Kim.”

She recognized the tone in Philip’s voice and knew it was useless to argue. She held up her hand in defeat before he could say any more. “At least wake me up when Judy comes.”

“Maybe,” he answered, smiling gently at her. 

Kim rolled her eyes. “And I thought I was stubborn,” she muttered before getting slowly to her feet. Her attention turned to Alan. “Do you need more pain medicine yet?”

Alan glanced up at her and shook his head before looking back at the album. 

“You’re stalling,” Damian observed. He folded his arms across his chest and waited for her counter-argument. He was quickly learning from Philip that Kim’s stubbornness could only be countered by tenacity and sound reasoning. How long had it taken the two of them to reach this level of understanding, he wondered. Philip and Kim never seemed to push each other too far, as if knowing exactly where the lines were drawn between concern and coercion. 

On cue, Kim rolled her eyes again before disappearing into the bedroom for some much-needed rest.

* * * *

After pacing for awhile along the far wall, Jackie retreated to the dining room, away from Megan’s scrutiny. She sank into the chair she had placed there the day she arrived and let herself have a good cry. She was so sick of being cooped up here, with virtually nothing to do aside from an occasional trek to the grocery store. She was tired of being bored, tired of fighting the effects of the conversion, and tired of living in a virtual commune where solitude was only a memory. Privacy and modesty were not in the vocabulary of her companions, although they did try to give her some semblance of isolation when she wanted it. Thank God she had her own bed outside of the shuttle. For all she knew, they had an orgy in there every night. And what was wrong with not wanting to participate? Megan’s comment ate at her, and she wasn’t sure why. Since when was abstinence evidence of bigotry and racism?

She heard a car engine and stiffened. What if Darlene had returned? Was she equal to dealing with Darlene again, especially after Kim came back?

Kim. Why did everything always come back to Kim? Kim wants to infiltrate, Kim wants to stay hidden, Kim needs our help, Kim this, Kim that. What about throwing a bit of concern for Jackie in there now and then? Jackie was captured, Jackie was tortured, Jackie was converted. And all anyone cares about is whether or not Jackie will help Kim.

She got up from her chair and resisted the urge to smash it against the wall. May as well get this over with. She blotted her wet cheeks on her shirt, smoothed her hair, and opened the door.

Ted and a new guy were walking towards her end of the building. Ted’s face brightened when he saw her and he walked faster. “Jackie, this is Anthony.”

Jackie looked at the new member of their group and forced a weak smile to her face. “Hi.”

“Paul thought I might be able to help out with Kim since I have some medical training.” Anthony paused a moment then added, “I’m a conversion technician.”

The smile slid from her face when he mentioned helping Kim, and a venomous look filled Jackie’s eyes at the sound of the word ‘conversion.’ “Go to hell!” she snarled before stepping back and slamming the door in their faces.

Ted closed his eyes and sighed. The headache that had been building in his temples all day had just worsened tenfold. “Any chance you can brainwash me into forgetting I ever heard of Earth?”

* * * *

As the afternoon wore on, Alan dozed on the cot. Damian, fatigued from a restless night in a chair, let Philip talk him into lying down next to Kim in the bed with only a token protest that it would disturb Kim’s own rest.

With everyone else sleeping, Philip was left to his own devices. Bored, he started up Kim’s computer and busied himself typing in a message for her to find much later, perhaps when the fighting was done. Finished with that self-assigned task, he shut down the machine and placed the contact lenses back in his eyes. Kim’s degree of acceptance was unparalleled in his experience, and few humans showed signs of following her example. Possibly, they never would. Until then, he and the others would have to make concessions in order to get along with the humans. If only the concessions didn’t include contacts, he mused as he reached for his dentures, life would be much more pleasant.

* * * *

Back at the soundstage, none of the Visitors were thinking about trivialities like contacts. Jackie had sequestered herself in the food room, and the person who would usually be asked to approach her was near the top of Jackie’s hate list. Damian, who seemed capable of charming everyone, was still with Kim.

Megan, Ted and Anthony sat in the furniture grouping and quietly discussed Jackie while the subject of their conversation stewed behind a closed door. Anthony listened quietly until they had finished telling him everything they knew about her, and her friendship with Kim. Once Anthony was familiar with her case, Megan told the others of the discussion with Jackie that had primed her temper before Anthony’s arrival. 

Was it any wonder that Jackie had reacted badly, Anthony asked himself. Megan and Ted probably had no idea what horrors had been inflicted on Jackie’s mind during her sessions in the conversion chamber. Given her history, and her experiences during the war, it was a miracle she was as stable as she seemed. He removed his laser pistol from the holster on his leg and placed it on the small table nearby. “Let me talk to her.”

“Be careful. I’ve never seen her like that before. She might try to hurt you,” Ted warned.

Megan nodded agreement. “She’s been more volatile since she was on the mothership.”

Anthony stood up and regarded both of them with a thoughtful expression. “Can you blame her?” Slowly, so as not to alarm her, he opened the door to the food room. She sat huddled on a chair in the far corner, and she looked up when she heard him come in. 

“I’m sorry. I had no right to snap at you like that,” Jackie apologized.

Anthony was surprised. He had not expected an apology, and certainly not so soon. “After what you’ve been through, you had every right.” He left the door open, aware of the impact closing it could have on her. The mothership had hundreds of locked doors that had prevented escape. He wasn’t about to recreate that effect here. 

Slowly, he moved away from the door, out of her path of escape, and walked along the wall furthest from her. He stopped in the corner at the far end of the room, across from the corner she sat in, and slid down to sit on the floor. He wished he had civilian clothes instead of his uniform. He stretched his feet out in front of him and rested his hands on his lap. Every move was slowly executed, and his full awareness was tuned to her responses. “Paul suggested I come here to help take care of Kim. We didn’t know until Ted came that she was human. I really don’t know how much I’ll be able to help her, compared to what you can do for her.”

Jackie tried not to glare when she raised her head to gaze at him. The rage she had felt earlier was far from depleted.

“And I don’t think anyone has ever tried to undo the effects of conversion before,” he continued calmly, watching her with that damned psychologist’s gaze. “But I’m willing to try if you are.”

“We don’t have any of that equipment here,” Jackie whispered, not letting herself look away from the face of hope.

“I know. Maybe we don’t need it. Diana’s method is to use drugs and other means to induce a suggestive state, where she can then manipulate you into conjuring up horrific images in your mind. Hypnosis can put you into a similar state of mind, but she can’t use that since none of her prisoners want to help torture themselves. Anyone can fight hypnosis, but drugs are different.”

“So hypnotize me.”

Anthony shook his head. “Not so fast. I think we should wait a few days. For this to work, you have to be able to trust me, and we just met. And I’d like to involve Kim. Megan says she has been your friend for many years.”

Jackie nodded, not trusting herself to make a tactful comment.

“I know you are upset with her right now, and I think you have every right to be. But over the years, you have probably told her about your past. One of Diana’s approaches is to alter your memories, confusing you about what really happened compared to what Diana told you happened. Kim may be able to clarify which memories are yours. Do you think she would be willing to do that?”

Jackie nodded.

“Can you accept her help, in spite of the way she deceived you?”

“Do I have a choice?”

Anthony chose his words carefully. “Despite her deception, I suspect Kim’s influence is the reason you were aided in escaping the mothership. Only one other human who endured the conversion process has returned to the surface with her will intact. Martin was directly involved.”

Seeing her interest, he continued. “He’s high up in the ranks, and he’s fifth column. It doesn’t take a genius to figure out why he was involved both times.”

Jackie didn’t want to be grateful to Kim for saving her life; she wanted to be bitter about the deception. It wasn’t necessarily fair, but it was human. She toyed with the hem of her shirt, pulling at a loose thread.

Anthony went on, “And Kim was associating with him at the time. Her ties to you are obvious, as is Jacob’s involvement in your escape. I suspect Kim has ties to the other woman as well.”

“What’s her name?” Jackie asked, only half-interested.

“Juliet Parish.”

Jackie’s mouth dropped open and she stared at him.

“You know her?” Anthony asked rhetorically.

“She’s my sister.”

Anthony nodded once as he absorbed that information, considering the ramifications, then slowly got up and slipped out of the room.

* * * *

Alan roused and noticed that Philip was wearing his contacts once again, which surprised him. “Going somewhere?”

Philip gave him a questioning look that changed to understanding. “That’s right. You slept through their visit last night. Judy is a friend of Kim’s and has been her contact throughout the war. Jackie’s son, Jeremy, is staying with her. They are coming back tonight to see Kim.” He glanced at his watch. “I expect they will be here within the hour.”

Alan looked at him, stunned. 

“What’s wrong?”

Alan held up his arm in reply. The sleeve of the T-shirt Kim had given him stopped well above his elbow, leaving the hole in the pseudoskin and the scales underneath fully exposed. If Philip, who looked completely human, was wearing contacts while they were here, they must be unaware of the Visitors’ differences. He could only imagine what response his Sirian skin would evoke in their guests. Philip looked at him sympathetically, but didn’t seem overly concerned. Didn’t he understand?

“I wouldn’t worry about it. Judy came in with us yesterday, and she saw a lot more than your arm when Kim operated on you.”

“You have your contacts in,” Alan countered.

Philip had to concede that point. “It’s easier for them to make eye contact if we wear them. Kim’s an exception.” 

“What about when we leave here tomorrow?”

“I’m sure Kim will be able to fix it. But I don’t think we need to wake her up to take care of it now. Trust me on this. I’ve talked with Judy a lot in the past and the one who’s going to be under the most scrutiny tonight is Kim, believe me.” He handed Alan the case his contacts had been placed in they day before. “I know this has been a big shock to you, but you have nothing to fear from Judy or Kim. In fact, Judy is a lot like you- she’s doing the right thing in spite of her uncertainty.”

* * * *

Judy arrived not long after Alan woke, with Jeremy and Muff in tow. Philip let her in, then stepped away when Muff growled at him. “She’s sleeping.”

She smiled an apology at him and hushed the dog. “However did you manage to get her to agree to that? Kim abhors taking naps.” She opened the bedroom door a few inches and set the dog down inside, knowing he would snuggle with his mistress while she slept. When the door was closed once again, she settled herself on a stool in the lab and turned to Alan. “You look better than you did last night. How are you feeling?”

“Better. Thanks.”

“Here’s the stuff Kim wanted,” Jeremy said, laying the stethoscope on the lab bench. He placed an envelope labeled “Mom” next to it.

“How is Jackie?” Judy asked bluntly. Last night, talk had focused on Kim.

“She’s no worse, which in itself is good. I’m not an expert, but I think that in time, she’ll fight off most of the effects of the conversion.” Philip leaned back in his chair and kept one eye on the clock. Hopefully, Kim would wake up soon.

* * * *

Damian woke feeling deliciously warm. Kim was on her side with her back towards him, but snuggled up right beside him. His arm was around her, and his hand rested in a small pile of fur. Huh? He sat up and looked over, barely making out the form of her dog in the virtually black room. Kim stirred at his movement and yawned. He could tell from the change in her breathing she was awake. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to wake you. I was just surprised to find your dog here.”

“It’s okay.” Kim grinned in the dark and stroked her dog’s fur. It was nice to wake up with him beside her again. “And if Muff’s here, that means Judy and Jeremy are here. Brace yourself, I’m going to turn on the light.” She flipped the switch and blinked rapidly in the sudden brightness.

“Wonderful,” Damian muttered, lying back down on the bed.

“What?”

“My contacts are out there.”

Kim frowned. “I’m sorry.” She shook her head and looked away, angry at the situation.

“What are you sorry for?”

Kim looked into his eyes and lost herself in their depths for a moment before she answered. “It’s not fair that you all have to keep pretending like this.”

“It’s not your fault.” 

“That doesn’t make it okay.” She touched her fingers to his cheek. “I’ll be right back.” She breezed through the lab, retrieved his contacts and dentures as nonchalantly as she could manage, and was back in the bedroom before Judy had a chance to initiate conversation. Smiling, she sat down on the bed next to Damian, waving the case like a trophy. “Mission accomplished,” she whispered, then leaned close and kissed him. Once he was sufficiently dazed, she got up and slipped from the room.

* * * *

Kim ventured back into the brightly lit lab and spotted the stethoscope on the bench top. “Do you mind if I take this with us tomorrow morning?” Kim asked, holding up the device.

“You’re leaving so soon?” Judy looked at her in alarm. The dim lights in the bedroom last night had hidden the extent of Kim’s poor appearance. Now, though, the dark circles under her eyes were plainly visible. The upsetting glimpse she had gotten when Kim dashed through a few minutes ago was substantiated by the image of the gaunt waif in front of her. Kim’s skin was waxen, save for red areas of irritation from wearing the masks. Judy had visited healthier-looking people in the hospital.

“Alan’s strong enough to go back now,” Kim answered with a shrug of her shoulders. She sat down in one of the chairs, bracing herself for the coming confrontation. Muff jumped into her lap and immediately lay down. Kim stroked his fur, wishing her own life could be so simple. Damian joined them and nodded a greeting before moving to an unoccupied stool.

Judy approached, standing close so she loomed over her. “You’re not. Have you looked in a mirror lately? I’ve never seen you so pale. And even though you’re pregnant, you’re dangerously thin. What have you been eating?”

“Don’t ask questions you don’t want answers to, Judy,” Kim replied in a tone which, though barely above a whisper, still carried a hard edge. 

Kim looked up at her and saw that Judy’s eyes begged for clarification, although a deep fear prevented her from doing so. “Look, whatever can be done, is being done. Yes, I’m eating. No, not enough, but I’m so nauseated most of the time that I can’t keep food down.”

Kim took a calming breath and coaxed Judy down to a stool beside her. “I’m not going to lie to you. My health is very precarious right now and I know that. It’s very possible that there will be... unforeseen complications during delivery. Going to a hospital isn’t an option, and neither is going back to the mothership.” She squeezed the hands of her would-be mother, wishing she could give her the reassurances she so desperately wanted. “But I’m not alone. They’ve been taking good care of me, and I suspect the henpecking is only going to get worse when we get back.”

“How can you be so calm?” Judy whispered. She pulled her fingers free of Kim’s and pushed the collar of Kim’s shirt down, revealing that what she had first feared to be a bruise was actually something much more frightening.

“Being anything else takes energy I don’t have.” Kim tugged Judy’s hand away from her neck, though she didn’t bother to adjust the front of her shirt. “None of us know exactly what Diana did to me, or even how it’s possible. That doesn’t matter right now. What does matter is that we keep going. I need you to keep helping the column.” Kim’s hand went to her abdomen. “Someone will let you know how it turns out, if I’m unable...”

“Don’t you even think it!” Tears welled up in Judy’s eyes as she tried to deny the possibility.

Kim felt moisture run down her own cheeks, but didn’t brush it away. “I will think it, because my death is a very real prospect. But since there is nothing that can be done, I’d rather not dwell on it.” Kim steered the conversation to safer topics. “How’s Becky?”

“She’s missing.” Judy saw the horror in Kim’s eyes and forged on. “Everyone in her apartment building was taken several months ago. Sandy’s with me.” 

Kim closed her eyes and bowed her head, trying to rally in the light of this news. She forced herself to look at Judy again. “I’m sorry. If it becomes possible to access the mothership computers sometime, we’ll try to locate her. But it won’t be anytime in the foreseeable future.” Kim sighed. “If she made it to storage, it’s probably best to leave her there for now. She’s less likely to draw attention that way.”

Philip saw Kim look away and knew she was revisiting Andrew’s death in her mind. Judy was watching Kim intently, obviously trying to decipher the unspoken meanings she sensed were there. 

“Is that what happened to Andy?” The words were out of her mouth before Judy could stop herself.

Kim’s gaze became sharp, as if she just now realized what she had revealed. “In part.” She met Philip’s eyes, taking comfort in his silent support, then looked at the floor. 

Judy pressed a warm hand to her shoulder. “How can I help?”

Kim shook her head without looking up. “Kill Diana.”

“There are days I would like to,” Judy admitted wistfully. “But how can I help you? Do you need supplies? Are there things you can take back with you that would help in the coming weeks? Tell me what you need. And what about for the baby?”

Kim closed her eyes, trying to focus her mind on the question. “Everything. We have the bare necessities: food, shelter, and the clothes on our backs. It’s amazing, if you think about it, how few things one needs to survive. The boredom is the worst. I’ve read the same paperback book eight times already. I’ve started correcting the grammar. I’m on my third time through with that, and I’m still finding errors. Still, it’s not as boring as guard duty, so I shouldn’t complain.”

“It wasn’t boring yesterday,” Philip added, looking at Alan. “And while I appreciated the break from monotony, I’d rather you didn’t get shot again.”

Alan smiled slightly and said nothing.

Judy’s face took on a thoughtful expression. “Are the keys in the car?”

“Yes, why?” Kim was intrigued.

“I plan to fill the trunk before you leave.”

“Don’t include anything valuable. If we have to move in a hurry, packing won’t be a priority,” Kim warned.

“Okay.”

* * * *

As the evening wore on, the early strains in the conversation gave way to serious discussion, light banter, and speculation as to how the war would eventually end. Kim retreated into her own thoughts a few times, wishing she could freeze the clock here and now, when there was a hint of joy in the air. Too soon, it was time for Judy and Jeremy to leave, so Kim and the others could eat a meal and retire for some rest.

Judy tried to hold back a yawn and failed. She stretched her arms over her head and stood up to go. “Will we see you in the morning?”

Kim shook her head. “We should go while it’s still dark, so we don’t attract as much attention.”

“The curfew doesn’t lift until dawn,” Judy reminded her.

“I know. We’ll be careful.” Kim stood up and hugged her. “Thank you. Try not to worry. And I won’t forget your letter to Jackie, so don’t you worry either,” she assured Jeremy as she walked them to the door. Muff was handed over to Judy’s waiting arms and good-byes were quickly exchanged with the Visitors. Kim closed the door behind them and leaned on it for a moment. Total silence had settled over the lab, which seemed too harsh a contrast to the animated laughter and conversation that had filled the room moments before.

“Judy has been a good friend to you,” Philip said quietly.

“The best.” Kim blinked back the tears that had come unbidden when Judy and Jeremy had left. Desperate for a distraction, she picked up the stethoscope and sank back into her chair. 

“What is that?” Alan inquired.

“A stethoscope. It will let me hear the baby’s heartbeat,” Kim answered as she fitted the device to her ears and placed the bell against her abdomen. She closed her eyes, concentrating. No... In disbelief, she moved the bell to another location, with the same result. “I don’t believe this,” Kim muttered. She then shook her head, grinning at the idea.

“What?” Damian prodded her to explain.

“There are two heartbeats, one just slightly offset from the other...twins.”

“Are you sure?” Philip was concerned. He knew that with his own people, multiple births increased the risks. Twins meant that Kim’s already difficult pregnancy could become even more problematic as time went on.

“I know what I’m hearing, and I’m telling you there are two heartbeats.” She shook her head. “There’s a tendency for twins in my family, but the odds are still so low...”

“Let me hear.” Damian got up from his seat and knelt down beside her. He took the stethoscope and fitted the ear pieces to the human ears of the pseudoskin. Fortunately, the position of human ears was approximately the same as the location of Sirian tympanic membranes. 

“The heartbeats are very rapid,” Kim warned, and drummed her fingers on the arm of her chair in demonstration.

Damian nodded that he understood, then closed his eyes to concentrate while he listened. “She’s right.” He looked up at Kim, unsure if this was happy news or not. “So the occurrence of twins is rare?”

“Not as rare as with your people, but not real common either.” She sighed, knowing his unasked question. “Yes, it makes things more complicated and increases the risks.”

“Are you going to tell Judy?” Alan asked.

“Heck, no. She’s worried enough as it is, and knowing isn’t going to change anything.” She shook her head again. “I don’t believe this.”

“I want to hear, too,” Philip said.

Kim looked to Alan, who nodded also. Well, a third and fourth opinion certainly couldn’t hurt, she mused as she got up to join Alan on the cot. 

* * * *

Shortly before dawn, the foursome emerged from Kim’s basement to make the journey back to their waiting allies. Talk had been limited as they made their preparations, and gave way to silence when they reached the car. 

Philip drove, since he remembered the route they had taken. Alan sat up front, which allowed him to stretch his leg out. Damian sat next to Kim in the back seat, his fingers entwined with hers. Though Damian didn’t consider himself an expert on human health, it seemed to him that Kim was even paler today than she had been. Unlike yesterday, her hand was cool and clammy to the touch. The tension he felt in her fingers, added to darting, furtive glances at the passing scenery, provided an explanation. He didn’t blame her. A confrontation with Darlene was not something he himself would look forward to. He wasn’t even looking forward to witnessing it. And then there was the trepidation Kim had expressed over Jackie’s reaction. He hadn’t realized until this morning exactly how much of herself Kim had sacrificed when she had decided to help Alan. Her selflessness only drew him closer. Was she even aware of the effect she was having on him?

* * * *

Blaine was guarding the entrance and his face brightened when he saw Alan. He slid the door to the soundstage shut behind the car as soon as it had passed, then abandoned his post.

Philip saw Blaine’s approach in the rear-view mirror, but didn’t comment. He parked the car and got out, forgetting Blaine entirely when he looked at Kim. Her face was pale and drawn. Her eyes were wary when she looked past him to the approaching group. Turning his back to her, he saw Ted, Megan, and Drew approaching. Behind them, Jackie walked beside an unfamiliar individual.

“Anthony?” Kim was taken aback for a moment when she saw a new face behind Megan. For the moment, she forgot herself and reverted back into her role as Karen. “I didn’t realize you were with the column.” 

He offered his hand to her, Visitor style, and she clasped it gratefully, realizing the mistake she had made. His sympathy-filled eyes twinkled at her, amused at what he thought was her attempt to lighten the mood.

Kim glanced around warily. Her gaze settled next on Ted. “How’s Darlene?”

“All right. She’s staying with Paul,” he answered. He couldn’t help but stare a little at the pale, gaunt-but-pregnant shadow of a woman who stood before him. This was Karen?

Kim nodded, but didn’t comment.

“We traded her in for someone nicer.” Jackie finally spoke. There was an edge to her voice that Kim knew was directed at her and not the Visitor. She locked her eyes with Kim’s.

Neither of them knew what to say. There were so many things to explain, memories to reevaluate, that neither knew where to begin. The others stepped back, letting them square off.

Ted noticed how Damian and Philip fell in just behind Kim, protecting her flanks. Even Alan, standing next to Blaine and hampered as he was by the crutches, stayed close to the human who had saved his life. The three of them presented a unified front in support of Kim. On the other side, Anthony’s attention was focused on Jackie, and it seemed to Ted he was trying to read the human’s mind. Megan and Drew watched both of the humans with equal interest.

Kim broke first. Silently, she held out an envelope with “Mom” written on it. A peace offering.

Jackie recognized her son’s handwriting, and she reached out to accept the gift. Her hand trembled as she took it, but she didn’t extend her reach to touch Kim’s fingers. Their only contact came vicariously, through the envelope, and lasted merely for the instant they both had the paper in their grasp. Her eyes went back to Kim’s, searching for... something.

“Judy and Jeremy packed the trunk. The keys are in the ignition,” Kim said quietly, then looked down. She felt her shaky composure begin to shatter and she moved away, mumbling something about needing to lie down.

Damian and Philip held an instant conference with their eyes, then broke formation. Damian accompanied Kim into the shuttle, while Philip stayed to draw Jackie’s wrath towards himself, in the hopes she would be gentler with Kim once her anger was dispelled. Alan nodded once to Blaine that he was all right, then slowly followed Kim and Damian to the shuttle. Kim wasn’t the only one who wanted to lie down.

Jackie looked at the envelope in her hands, then at Kim’s retreating form. She knew Philip was waiting for her to say something, but the words wouldn’t come. She sighed and folded the envelope, then stuffed it into the back pocket of her jeans before striding towards the parked car.

* * * *

In the shuttle, Kim collapsed into her bunk and curled up with her face to the wall. The brief encounter had done nothing to alleviate the tension she felt, and she didn’t know how to proceed. She knew that she had run away from the situation by retreating to the shuttle, but had not known what else to do. Away from her house, she was adrift without Karen. She had become Karen, or Karen had become part of Kim. She couldn’t be certain which was the case. What happened when the actor became the role?

“You okay?” Damian asked softly as he sat down on the edge of the narrow bunk. He put his hand on the far side of the bunk, just above her knees, and leaned over a little so he could see her face. 

“No, but I’ll survive, thanks.” Kim covered his hand with her own and closed her eyes. 

Alan joined them in the shuttle and claimed the bottom bunk adjacent to her own. A questioning look to Damian was answered with a head shake. Alan’s gaze became sympathetic, and he shook his head at the situation before lying down to sleep. The return trip had sapped his energy.

“Is there anything I can get you?” Damian asked her quietly.

“Are there any extra blankets, or does Jackie have them all?”

Damian didn’t answer, but instead stood and opened an overhead compartment. He removed a piece of fabric that had a silver metallic sheen. It was thin, but very effective. He shook the folds out and covered her with it. “Get some sleep,” he told her, placing a gentle hand on her shoulder. She nodded, and he moved towards the front of the shuttle and closed the privacy panel behind him. The lights in the shuttle dimmed to near darkness and she heard his footsteps on the ramp, indicating that she and Alan were alone.

* * * *

Philip let Jackie head towards the car by herself, realizing she needed more time to deal with the situation before confronting them. He headed instead for the couch. Megan went to relieve Blaine from guard duty, knowing Philip was going to fill them in on how he and Kim had managed to end up where they were today. Ted claimed a chair that faced Philip, while Drew and Blaine took seats on the loveseat adjacent to the sofa where Anthony and Philip sat. When Damian emerged from the shuttle, he took over radio duty.

Philip leaned back into the soft cushions. It was draining to have to cover all of this material again, but he preferred to do it himself and spare Kim the effort. Then they would be able to skip past Kim’s history and move directly to their inevitable questions when she woke from her badly-needed nap. He directed his attention to Ted. “How much did Megan tell you?”

“As much as she knew. And she read us the letter Kim left for you. It’s clear that Kim has been through a lot...”

Philip nodded. “Much more than any of you know.” He pretended not to notice when Jackie left her self-assigned task of unloading the car and brought a chair over to sit on, just outside the boundaries of the circle the others were sitting in.

Jackie didn’t want to sit next to Philip, but she knew she needed to hear this before she faced Kim again. She had never felt as much of an outsider to the group as she did right now. She alone was harboring deep bitterness about Kim’s deception, and she didn’t regard her long-time friend with the god-like awe that the others seemed to feel when thinking about Kim. Jackie didn’t need answers so much as she craved a context in which to understand how the lie had been allowed to consume Kim. 

Listening to Philip talk, though, reminded her just how much Kim had suffered for Andy’s sake. Only to lose him. For the first time, she received confirmation that Kim had been unable to watch Jackie suffer and pleaded for her release, despite the potentially crippling results to the fifth column effort on the ship. She heard about Julie’s capture, conversion, and rescue. Philip’s narrative told her more about life on board the mothership than she had ever known before, and she was forced to interrupt Philip several times so he could clarify things everyone else in his audience knew from experience. She wondered if he was painting the graphic picture for her sake.

She watched him while he talked, and could hear the concern he felt for Kim in his voice. But his eyes showed concern for her. She was reminded of the day she had pressed him for information about Karen, how he had told her to be patient, that she wouldn’t like the truth when she heard it. He’d known, even then, and had supported her still. As much as she wanted to, she couldn’t stay mad at him. She owed him her life. He’d rescued her from a horrible fate, bandaged her wounds, protected her from herself, and guided her back to Kim. All the while, knowing she might one day hate him for the deception involved.

“Is she still suicidal?” Anthony asked quietly. Megan had shown him Kim’s letter the afternoon of his arrival, so he was working from the same information everyone else had.

Philip shook his head. “No. At the time, Andrew had just been killed, and she had to spend several more days on board before Martin could arrange her ‘death.’ By the time she reached her house, she was desperate. Being alone while she tried to deal with her feelings of guilt didn’t help, and I think that is what drove her to try. Going to Paul was the smartest thing she could have done under the circumstances. Especially considering how Andrew died.”

“What happened?” Ted wanted to know.

Philip shook his head. “He was murdered. The details are something she doesn’t want to talk about, and I don’t blame her. It won’t change anything.”

* * * *

Kim roused when she heard Alan getting up. She yawned and slowly eased out of the bunk, then switched the light intensity up so she could see her way around without stumbling. “I don’t suppose staying in here forever is a viable option?” she asked, running her fingers through her hair in an attempt to tame the unruly locks.

“You’re still worried about Jackie?” Alan leaned on the crutches and regarded her curiously. “She seemed calm earlier.”

“You don’t know Jackie like I do. A lot of anger is lurking beneath that calm appearance and this isn’t going to be resolved with her for a long time.” Kim yawned again. “I’m going to get something to eat. Are you hungry?”

Alan nodded.

“Then why don’t you go sit on the couch and I’ll go fetch dinner,” Kim suggested, then waited for him to exit the shuttle. As he carefully made his way down the ramp, Kim looked around. Damian was in on the radio, and Drew was helping Jackie unload the car. Megan was presumably on guard duty outside. The others were all sitting together and talking quietly. She felt their eyes turn to her and Alan, and she forced herself to act naturally as she walked past. 

* * * *

She returned with a package of hamburger and joined Alan on the loveseat to share it with him. She forced a light tone into her voice as she spoke in Sirian to Ted. “Aren’t you glad now that I turned you down?”

Jackie heard the strange-sounding language and glanced over to see what she had missed. Ted had never looked as flustered as he did now. The others were all smiling to varying degrees. Even Drew, who stood right next to her, seemed to be amused. 

“What did she say?”

Drew shook his head, knowing how uncomfortable Jackie was with the Sirians’ open relationships. “She was just teasing Ted.”

Jackie was distracted from further questions when Kim took a bite of hamburger, then switched back to English. “It may not seem like it, but I made a real effort not to take advantage of the situation. Now you know why I never answered questions about my past.”

“You never spoke the language before,” Blaine commented.

Kim switched back to Sirian. “If my pronunciation didn’t give me away, my accent would have.”

“Drew,” Jackie whispered in a demanding manner.

Drew quickly translated for Jackie, so she could follow the exchange.

Between mouthfuls, Kim switched back to English again. “I only needed to be able to read, write, and listen. I could always avoid speaking myself by invoking Diana’s rule that everyone speak in Earth languages. That was a good thing, because there are some sounds in your language I simply can’t make.”

“Not for lack of trying,” Philip added, reminding them both of the hours of practice back in her lab.

Jackie saw the knowing look pass between the two of them and felt horribly excluded. She and Kim had once shared such looks. Now Kim spoke an alien language, and she was sitting next to Alan while both of them ate raw hamburger as if nothing were out of the ordinary. It was enough to make her want to scream. The final act of the play was over, so why did Kim insist on continuing the role? The joy she had initially felt when she opened the trunk and discovered the books, games, and linens Judy had sent was fading fast.

Alan moved closer to Kim and put his left arm around her shoulders. She leaned against him compliantly. They both continued to nibble on meat from the package she held in her lap. Her warmth was intoxicating, healing, and she had insisted yesterday that she didn’t mind the close contact her warmth made them all crave. She’d even claimed to savor the contact and gone on to explain how important touch was in close human relationships. 

“Does Martin know?” Drew inquired. He’d long since given up on helping Jackie and settled for leaning on the car while he listened to the nearby exchange.

Kim glanced at Philip with an impish grin, and then at Drew and nodded. “He didn’t believe me at first, but pseudoskin can only hide so much.” She met Jackie’s eyes almost by chance, and immediately looked away. The disapproval she saw in Jackie’s eyes was something she didn’t want to face right now.

* * * *

Jackie didn’t want to confront Kim in front of the others. She was already the outsider, and alienating the Visitors more wasn’t going to help any of them. She needed them too much. So when Kim got up to return the uneaten meat to the fridge, Jackie took the opportunity to talk to her alone.

She hung back in the doorway, not knowing what to say. They’d never had this problem before. “Kim, are you...” Bad start, Jackie. Try again. “You’re supposed to be craving dill pickles on ice cream, not hamburger that was never even shown the grill,” she joked lamely.

“I know.” Kim bowed her head after she closed the refrigerator door. “This is about all I can keep down.”

Jackie stepped into the room, forced to move closer so she could hear Kim’s reply. “Kim...you can’t... are you getting all the nutrients you need?”

“What difference does it make?”

“What difference...” 

Kim straightened and turned around. “I probably won’t survive this pregnancy. Vitamins won’t change that. If there are any complications, any at all, there isn’t going to be anything any of us can do. Carrying twins only adds to the risk.”

“Twins...” She searched Kim’s lifeless eyes.

“Judy loaned me her stethoscope yesterday. There are two heartbeats.”

Jackie didn’t know what to say, but knew expressing her own panic at the news was not a good idea. She stood there, groping for words, when she saw a dark bruise peeking from behind the open collar of Kim’s shirt. Her hand darted out and moved the fabric aside before Kim had time to react. When she saw the dark green area with scale patterns she jerked her hand away instinctively. Horrified, she looked into Kim’s eyes and saw the hurt. Hurt she had inflicted by pulling away in shock and what Kim probably perceived as revulsion. To be honest, she wasn’t certain that Kim’s perception was totally erroneous.

Kim straightened her collar. “It’s nothing.”

“The hell it is. My God, Kim, you’re turning into a Visitor! What did Diana do to you? You can’t live on a diet of raw meat forever. How long until you’re due?”

“Hoping I’ll die sooner and get it over with?” Kim said in a fatalistic tone.

“No! You know I don’t want that.” Jackie reached out and took her hand. Kim’s fingers felt cold. She looked down and realized how little flesh covered the bones of her wrists and hands. Kim was terribly underweight for someone who was pregnant. “Kim, what happened to you?”

Kim didn’t answer. She was so tired and didn’t feel equal to dealing with yet another barrage of questions. Questions she couldn’t answer, because they had no answers. She shut her eyes and pulled her hand away.

“Kim, you’re scaring me. I’ve never seen you like this.”

“Welcome to the war, Jackie,” Kim said softly before retreating from the room.

Jackie remained in place, frozen there by the realization that Kim expected to die. In all the years they had known each other, Kim had always been strong. Even when Marc died, the underlying strength had been there, lurking beneath the grief. Jackie had grown to think Kim was invincible, and had always envied her resilience. It was terrifying to realize that Kim’s strength was almost gone, and along with it, her will to live.

* * * *

Lorraine ducked into an infrequently used corridor and gestured for Martin to follow her. After a final glance over her shoulder, she moved into his arms. From all appearances, they were two lovers stealing a moment alone while on duty. 

“Steven has revived Mike Donovan’s son, Sean,” Lorraine whispered to him. 

Martin bowed his head and held her more closely to him. Mike had been obsessed with rescuing Sean since the day he was first taken, and had put the fifth column at great risk with his efforts. If Steven now knew about Sean, the boy’s death was almost guaranteed.

Martin sighed. “We can’t protect him. It’s too much of a risk.” 

“I agree, but thought you should be the one to decide,” Lorraine said quietly. She squeezed his hand and slipped away.

* * * *

After a couple of days, life settled back into a familiar routine at the soundstage. Once they heard the remaining details of the infiltration from Philip and then Kim, the columnists accepted her fully as one of their own. Kim continued taking turns on radio duty, and resumed her long hours of conversation with Damian in the shuttle while he completed the repairs.

Jackie felt increasingly like a barely-tolerated outsider. Before, she had known she was alone, and unique, as the sole human. But with Kim’s unmasking, that dynamic had changed. Kim understood the culture, the inside jokes, life on the ship. Even her body language was different. Sirian. She continued to flirt, Visitor fashion, and the finger play was too obvious to miss. Jackie had seen Kim flirting with just about everyone, but Damian and Philip especially. At first she thought the Visitors gravitated towards Kim for her body heat, until Jackie realized they hardly ever touched her at all. A long time ago, Philip had explained the way touch was regarded by his people, as just another, more serious level of flirtation. Armed with that information, Jackie had understood its absence in her own interactions with the columnists. Until now.

Anthony had replaced Philip as her confidant. Try as she might, she couldn’t turn to Philip for support like she once had, and Philip gracefully refrained from pressing the issue. Anthony listened to her for hours at a time, constantly validating her own feelings as she tried to come to terms with her war experiences. He never seemed to run out of patience with her, and he was the one bright spot in an otherwise miserable existence.

For the most part, she and Kim avoided each other. Or rather, Jackie avoided Kim. The few conversations they did have were strained and usually ended when the misery was too great to bear. 

Anthony’s initial attempts to hypnotize her were dismal failures as well. No matter how she tried, she couldn’t lower her guard enough for the hypnosis to be effective in triggering memories of her experiences on the ship. Without memories of the conversion process to guide him, Anthony was doubtful he would be able to help her combat the images planted deeply in her subconscious.

Jackie and Megan studied the books and prepared as best they could, but neither of them knew what to expect. Hours of worry were broken by chess and card games, which made the time pass faster for all of them. The columnists showed an interest in the games that Jackie found surprising, until Anthony reminded her that they knew they had to learn as much as they could about human cultures if they were to survive on the planet. Someday the war would end, and the columnists assumed that being stranded here was a distinct possibility, if there was a planet left to inhabit.

* * * *

Damian sank into the pilot’s seat and turned on the shuttle engines. Consoles sprang to life as Kim watched from her vantage point in the co-pilot’s seat. Many of the readouts were unfamiliar to her, but others she recognized as displaying information such as engine power level, external climate conditions, and the status of the weapons.

Damian nodded his head, satisfied with everything he was seeing. “I think all of the systems are functional again, except for the homing device.”

“Congratulations. How about we celebrate?”

He powered down the engines and watched the console go dark before turning to her. Something in her voice piqued his interest and he looked at her questioningly.

In answer, she stood up and beckoned him to follow her to the rear compartment. When the panel for the sleeping compartment was closed, securing their privacy, she moved closer to him and wrapped pliant fingers around his wrist.

He studied her intently, rather than responding with the counter signal. Gently disengaging his wrist, he took her face in his hands. “Are you sure?”

Kim smiled at him. “There is something you should know about me. Once I make up my mind, I’m not easily persuaded to change my decision.” She ran a finger along his profile. “And I don’t think you really want to persuade me, do you?” she whispered as she pulled him down onto a bunk.

* * * *

 “Is Kim in the shuttle?” Jackie asked Philip. He was sitting nearby, reading one of the books Judy had sent.

He put down his book and looked at her with solemn eyes. He had heard the engines power up, and noticed that no one emerged after the obvious success in completing repairs. “Stay out of the shuttle.”

“Why? It’s never been off limits to me before,” Jackie bristled. 

“I warned you before that there were things you didn’t want to know. For your own sake, stay out here.” Philip watched her, waiting to see if she would comply, or if he would be forced to explain further.

Jackie’s brow furrowed, wondering what he was talking about. The idea that came to mind was disquieting, and she mentally took role-call. Damian was in the shuttle, too. “Oh my...” she whispered and turned away. Her stomach rolled. This was too much for her to deal with. 

Shaken, she retreated to pace along the far wall, tracing a too-familiar path in the dust. She tried not to notice Megan watching her. Darn it, she was not a bigot! She had known Kim before any of them did, and this just wasn’t in Kim’s character! Especially in light of the obvious affection between Kim and Philip. Yet Philip was running interference while his presumed lover had a tryst with someone else. 

Jackie tasted bile and swallowed hard, willing herself to take calm, deep breaths. She needed to talk to someone desperately, but she doubted even Anthony would be able to explain this to her satisfaction.

* * * *

 “What are you doing?” Damian pulled back when he felt her fingernails dig through the pseudoskin around the base of his neck.

Kim’s brow furrowed, “What do you think?” She was determined to see his face. Taking all of it off wasn’t practical, given the effort involved in repairing it. The adhesive on the inner side worked for several applications, but fusing the seams in an unblemished fashion took skill and patience. Right now, she was short on patience.

“Kim...”

She shook her head at him as she worked her fingers under the pseudoskin and carefully pulled it free. “Argue all you want. I’ll get my way in the end. Don’t worry, I can repair it.” She casually tossed the mask aside and pulled him to her again.

“But the adhesive...” his token protest was cut short by a warm, human kiss. 

* * * *

Jackie finally gave up her pacing and tried to read instead. She turned page after page of one of the childbirth books without comprehending a word of the text. It was better to pretend to be busy than to be obviously waiting for Kim and Damian to emerge. She was grateful that Philip, who sat nearby reading, didn’t comment on her agitation.

After what seemed to be an eternity, Damian emerged from the shuttle and went to relieve Ted on guard duty. He smiled at her as he walked past, acting as if nothing had changed. Maybe for him, it hadn’t. But this was not the Kim she knew. As soon as Damian was at his post, she threw down her book and ventured into the shuttle.

“Kim...” Jackie stopped next to the opening that separated the sleeping compartment from the rest of the shuttle. Kim was sitting on the bottom bunk at the very rear, buttoning her shirt. She looked up when Jackie came in. Jackie couldn’t read the expression on her face. “I can’t take this anymore.”

Kim looked down at her fingers as they worked the buttons. “I’m sorry, but I can’t fix it for you. And I can’t be strong for you right now. It’s all I can do to get through each day.”

“Then at least talk to me! Help me to understand. Because right now, I don’t understand.” She gestured at the bunks. “Not this, not you. On the ship to survive is one thing, but here? I don’t care what your reasons are. Make something up if you have to. Lie to me if it helps. Tell me it’s another side effect of this strange pregnancy. Tell me anything. Just don’t keep shutting me out.”

“Jackie, how can I explain everything to you when I don’t claim to understand it myself? You want answers I can’t give you, because I don’t have them.” Kim rubbed her temples with her hands. The languid peace she had found in Damian’s arms a short time ago was all but gone.

“Then give me the answers you do have. Because right now, I’m terrified. I know how rough pregnancy can be, and it doesn’t take a genius to see that yours has been especially tough. But it’s not like you to give up like this. There was a time you would have poured over every medical text you could find, stopping at nothing to find answers and solutions. Megan and Anthony have already said they’ll help any way they can. And where are you? You’re more worried about satisfying your libido than living to raise your children!”

“I don’t expect them to survive, Jackie. You have enough background in biology to know how impossible this all is.” 

“The least you could do is fight to save them.”

“I tried that with Andrew, and it only hastened his death. Had I done nothing, he’d still be alive.” Kim got up and pushed past Jackie, squeezing her eyes tightly against the inevitable tears.

Jackie caught her arm. “Is that what this is about? Your sense of guilt?”

Kim jerked her arm away, anger filling her voice. “Has it ever occurred to you that one reason I didn’t tell you I was posing as Karen was because I didn’t want to face this constant barrage of questions from you? I don’t have the energy to keep dueling with you like this! I don’t have the energy to coddle you and take care of you. I have enough to deal with without your accusing glares every time you feel the effects of the conversion.

“You think I don’t know what you went through? I was there! And I did what I could, but too many other lives were at stake for me to put your welfare first. I did what I could on the ship, and when you came here, I protected you by keeping my distance.”

Kim tried to keep the viciousness from her voice, but only partially succeeded. “You are not ready to deal with the realities of my life, Jackie. I don’t know if you ever will be. I immersed myself in a new culture to survive. I’m sorry if the details of my new existence are offensive to you, but it’s none of your business who I sleep with, or when. I don’t expect you to approve, but I do expect you to stay out of it.”

Before Jackie could formulate a response, Kim had left the shuttle. She settled for hurling her fist into one of the so-called mattresses. When she realized she had used her left hand, she crumpled to the floor in tears.

* * * *

Kim wiped the tears away with the back of her hand and curled up next to Philip on the couch. He immediately set aside his book and put his arms around her.

“Will you go find Anthony? Jackie needs him.” She knotted his shirt in her hands, and he tightened his embrace. “And I need you.”

Philip kissed her temple where it pressed against his face and slipped out of her grasp. “I’ll be right back,” he promised. 

* * * *

Lorraine sat down next to Martin in the rec hall and reached across him to select a mouse from a serving container that held several. “Diana is planning to offer Sean up as bait, to get Mike to turn himself in,” she said softly as she pretended to debate over which rodent to snatch. “We have to assume it will work, and plan accordingly.”

“I can’t believe he would...” Martin let the thought trail off. Actually, Mike was quite likely to accept the bait to rescue his son, and rely on the fifth column to protect him once on board. “We can’t risk yet another rescue of Donovan. If he is taken prisoner again, he is to be offered a suicide capsule.”

“And if he refuses?” Lorraine asked, knowing the answer. She tipped her head back and lowered the struggling rodent to her mouth, snared it with her tongue, and swallowed it in one fluid motion.

“Then we kill him. He knows too much. We can’t let Diana question him. It could destroy the fifth column on board.”

“I agree. I’m sorry.” Lorraine squeezed his hand and slipped away, leaving Martin to sit and curse the human tendency to protect family members no matter the risks involved.

* * * *

Kim, needing some time alone, retired to one of the double beds rather than her bunk in the shuttle. She needed more and more sleep these days, and her rest was often interrupted by the sounds of the others coming or going, depending on their shifts. Even though the Visitors moved quietly, trying not to disturb her, she slept so lightly that the slightest sound roused her.

“Kim?”

Kim opened her eyes and saw Damian kneeling next to the bed. “What’s wrong?”

“That’s what I’m here to ask you. I heard about Jackie.”

“You don’t need to worry about that. She’s mad at me, and lashing out any way she can. She doesn’t understand.” 

“I’m not sure I do either.”

Kim moved back from the edge of the double bed and flipped back the covers. “Then you may as well lie down, because the explanation could take awhile.”

He slipped off his shoes and settled himself on the mattress stiffly, still unsure of the dynamics of their interaction. 

Kim moved closer and rested her head on his shoulder. She toyed with the buttons of his shirt and then unbuttoned them. “Maybe all night,” she whispered suggestively before growing serious again.

Damian relaxed when her tone turned playful and wrapped his arm around her. He realized then that Kim was really all right, in spite of Jackie’s outburst. He nuzzled his cheek against her hair and let her intoxicating warmth soothe his tired muscles. “All night?”

“Umm hmmm. Unless you have something else you’d rather do, like pull an extra shift on guard duty.”

Damian groaned. “Don’t mention guard duty.”

Kim switched to Sirian and lowered her voice. “Is she still awake?”

“I’m not sure,” Damian replied in the same language. “She went to bed awhile ago.”

“Then we’d better not use English, just in case she is awake and can hear us. It isn’t something she’d have an easy time hearing us talk about. You’ll just have to put up with my accent.”

“It’s really not that noticeable.”

“A very charitable assessment, I’m sure,” Kim commented, then grew serious. “Personal relationships are handled very differently in the culture Jackie and I grew up in.” 

* * * *

She talked for a long time, trying to help Damian view the situation from Jackie’s eyes. He listened intently, though at times it was difficult to concentrate. Between the sound of her voice speaking his own language and the feel of her body, he was somewhat distracted. He ran his hand along her side from shoulder to thigh. The thin shirt she slept in did little to shield his palm from her warmth, and even less to hide the soft curves of her human form. While none of his lovers would ever describe him as rough, he was especially gentle with Kim. He’s seen how easily Jackie and Kim bruised, their skin being more fragile than his own scales. There was something about her that evoked a level of tenderness he’d never felt before.

It grew more difficult to concentrate when she began her own exploration, evoking responses no human could emulate. He felt her fingers run along the base of his crest, from his brow to the nape of his neck and he moaned softly.

Kim felt his crest flare against the confines of the crown of hair bonded to pseudoskin. She closed her eyes, pleased at his reaction, and trailed her fingers lightly over his face. His tongue coiled around her finger as it brushed his lips, and she started, opening her eyes. His tongue disappeared and he looked at her apologetically.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered, realizing he’d broken the mood.

Kim shook her head contritely and pressed her forehead against his, holding his head between her palms. “Don’t be sorry. You just startled me.” The tension she felt beneath her fingers didn’t ease. “Please, don’t be uncomfortable. There’s bound to be an awkward moment or two on occasion, even with two people of the same species. I was just surprised. No one’s done that with me before.”

“No one?” he asked softly.

Kim chuckled slightly and rubbed her nose against his. “You’re third on my very short list of lovers, Damian.”

His puzzlement gave way in a moment, when he realized what she meant. “You mean third Sirian.”

“Third anyone,” she corrected him.

“What about Marc?” 

Kim shook her head and pulled back so she could meet his eyes. “Unless you count just kissing.” She pushed his shoulder playfully. “Haven’t you listened to a word I’ve said?”

“But you also said a lot of people ignore those rules.”

“I didn’t. Marc and I were waiting until we got married. Philip had to teach me everything,” she explained, tracing the lines of his human lips. Damian cautiously snared her finger with his tongue again, and she smiled at him. “Obviously, my education was somewhat incomplete. Care to remedy that?”

Further conversation became impossible.

* * * *

Sated, Damian wrapped his arms around her and resumed their earlier, abandoned discussion. “So the idea is to marry someone you’ve never slept with?”

“That’s right.” She pressed her back more firmly against him and ran her hands over his arms. “Humans have an innate desire to pair bond with one person to start a family. It’s like the clinic, except in the United States, the individuals make their own choice, and fidelity is part of the arrangement. Some people have affairs, sure, but the desire for an exclusive pair bond is always there on some level.”

“Even for you?”

 “Even for me. Even when I know it will never happen,” she admitted, glad they were conversing in his language. This was not a conversation she wanted to share with Jackie.

“It could.”

“Not likely.” Kim enunciated the words carefully, all too aware of the odds.

“I’m married.”

“What?” Kim sputtered and pulled away. She turned onto her back so she could look at him. “You’re in the military. You’re not allowed to get married until you resign from active duty. And Philip told me that’s rare, since by the time you get done with active duty, the clinic never summons you.”

“Those are the rules of the clinic and the government. Lorraine and I defied them— secretly, of course. You’re the first person I’ve told. The point is, some of us DO commit to a life with one person.”

Kim was still stalled on the first part of his revelation. “Lorraine. You mean the Lorraine Martin has relied on to help him organize column activities on the L.A. ship? That Lorraine?”

“That’s her.” Damian nodded and his gaze grew distant. “She probably thinks I’m dead.”

Kim didn’t hear him. She sat up and hugged herself tightly, still reeling from his confession.

“What’s wrong?”

“What’s wrong? I like Lorraine. I’m not looking forward to explaining to her why I’m having an affair with her husband, that’s what’s wrong!”

“Kim, lie down.” Damian coaxed her back into his arms. “Now you’re the one who’s uncomfortable when you don’t need to be.”

Kim sighed, but the tension in her body remained. “You’re right. If you don’t care, I shouldn’t.” She looked askance at him. “Am I correct in assuming that fidelity is not part of this arrangement?”

Damian regarded her tenderly and shook his head. “It can’t be. Not in the fleet. Not when we’ve had to keep it secret.”

“What if she comes to the surface? What then?” 

“Then, I suppose, for the first time, we’d have the luxury of choice, especially if we stayed here when the war ends.” He stroked her hair, not daring to think too much about the future, lest he be disappointed. “But she’s on the ship, and I’m here.”

“With me,” Kim added, finally relaxing. 

He debated if he should ask the question that had been on his mind for days. He finally decided if she didn’t want to answer, she’d say so. “It’s Martin, isn’t it?”

Kim looked at him for a long moment, then turned away, nodding. “Crazy, I know.”

“No. It’s not crazy at all.”

Kim’s voice took on a sarcastic tone. “Mr. Promiscuity himself is going to leave the fleet and settle down on Earth with a human wife and two kids? Right!” 

“He could. And for the record, his twin brother is the promiscuous one.”

Kim’s gaze snapped back to meet his. “His twin? As in identical twin?”

“You mean there are still a few things you don’t know?” he teased as he nodded in answer to her question. “How much do you know about how twins are raised?”

Kim thought back to what Philip had told her. She closed her eyes and concentrated, reciting facts from memory. “Identical twins are rare, even more so than here. But the ones that are born are raised in an institution, a laboratory of sorts. They are not allowed to form relationships other than with their twin. Most choose the military, since the military structure is more comfortable than the normal social structure for them. They are called to the reproductive clinic frequently, perhaps because of their social class.”

She opened her eyes. “I think it is more likely that they are being used in reproductive experiments, though my guess is they are told they are of superior genetic stock, and never realize they are being used in that way.”

“What makes you think that?” Damian prodded.

“Something Diana said once. And since the clinic arranges all pairings anyway, I can’t imagine them passing up that temptation.”

“How is it you can so quickly figure out what it took me years to realize?”

“I’m a born cynic?” Kim smiled and looked to see if he wanted a serious answer. He did. “I think I’ve started to question everything I’ve heard, since I know so much of it is propaganda. I take it I’m right?”

“I can’t say for certain, but I agree with your suspicion. The official view is that twins are exceptional individuals, and that is why they are compensated with material wealth and choice assignments. Like you, I suspect it’s a way of keeping their subjects complacent and cooperative while the government exploits them. The clinic has only been in operation for a hundred years or so, but that’s plenty of time for them to track their results for several generations.”

“And that’s how Martin grew up...” Kim remarked. “Do you know how cold and horrible that sounds to someone like me, who grew up with a mother who loved me like she did?”

“My father enjoyed being a parent, even if it was his duty,” Damian remarked before his thoughts returned to Martin. “I’ve wondered if the fifth column movement arose partly out of his rebellion against the government in general.”

“Is his brother involved in the column, too?”

“Not that I know of. He’s still on the home world, though he is in the military. He’s an Inspector General, and known to have the favor of the Leader. He’ll never be assigned to Earth while Martin is here.”

“Why not?”

“Identical twins have a mystique about them. The military would never risk them being on the same assignment, where orders might be disobeyed out of loyalty to a sibling.”

 Kim thought back to conversations she had shared with Martin. He had understood her bond with Andrew. And he had knowingly gotten himself assigned to Earth to lead the fifth column, realizing he might never see his brother again, which meant he also understood self-sacrifice. She shook her head, fighting the desire to read more into their similarities than was really there. If anything, his upbringing made him even less prepared than most Sirians for marriage and child-rearing. What Damian had told her, in an attempt to give her hope, only convinced her that her heart’s desire would never be fulfilled.

It was too much to deal with, which made it far better to live for today and not worry about what the future held. Resolving to do just that, she turned her attention back to seducing her current companion. 

* * * *

Their confrontation in the shuttle only increased the tension between Jackie and Kim. Strained conversations gave way to silences and mutual avoidance. Days passed with barely a word being exchanged between them. But Jackie couldn’t hide her alarm when she noticed Kim emerge from the bathroom even more ashen-faced than usual. “What’s wrong?”

Philip and Megan, who were sitting on the couch discussing how to best help spirit a recently targeted human family into the network of safe-houses, paused and looked up at Jackie’s question.

“I’ve started spotting blood.” Kim avoided meeting Jackie’s eyes, and looked instead at Philip as she headed towards the bed behind the nearby privacy screen.

Jackie reached for one of the books stacked on the floor by her feet. She flipped through to find a familiar chapter. “That isn’t necessarily a bad indication. It could just be a sign of minor bruising or something. What color was it? I remember reading something about the color somewhere...”

“You won’t find the answers in that book, Jackie.”

“Maybe not this one, but I know I read it somewhere. Gimme a second to check the index.”

“Look under ‘green.’” Kim kept her eyes focused straight ahead and went to lie down.

Jackie lost all animation and the book slid from her lap. She leaned back into the couch cushions and shut her eyes. “Damn.”

* * * *

Martin entered his access code and tried to ignore the sick feeling he always got when visiting the interrogation chambers. He couldn’t help but wonder how long it would be until he was on the receiving end of Diana’s questions. The doors parted and he set such thoughts aside. It was never safe to be distracted when in the same room as Diana. He had been finishing a double shift when he received Diana’s summons. Fatigue alone made him vulnerable to making mistakes; distraction on top of that could be fatal.

“Diana.” Martin nodded his head slightly as he stepped into the chamber. A glance around the room told him they were alone. The alcove where the restraining chair sat was unoccupied for the moment. 

Diana casually glanced up from her computer console. “Lieutenant.” How she loved addressing him by that rank! She was careful to conceal her gloating, however, and pretended to still be at work. Donovan was a very important prisoner and there were few on board she could rely on to assist her during the interrogation of the resistance leader. Martin would undoubtedly ask excellent questions, which would aid her in destroying the human resistance. Certainly, success would earn her a promotion. Martin had supported her rise through the ranks, and she would soon be in a position to reward him for his loyalty and his instruction.

She finally logged out of the system and picked up a subcutaneous injector. “I’ve perfected a truth serum that is very effective with humans. I’m having a special prisoner brought in for questioning.” Diana toyed with the device, filled with pride at her accomplishment. “I would like you to assist in the interrogation.”

Martin nodded, hoping the fear he felt didn’t show in his eyes. Donovan had traded himself for his son yesterday, just as he and Lorraine had feared he would. Martin had wrestled half the night with his feelings of guilt for ordering his death; he regarded Donovan as a friend. Thankfully, no one had noticed his lapses in concentration during his turn on the graveyard shift, and morning had brought resignation and regret. Donovan was surely dead, either by capsule or killed by the fifth columnist sent to deliver it. Had someone suspected his involvement and suggested it to Diana? Diana herself might suspect him and have summoned him here specifically to watch his reaction. He was determined to show none: not the relief and fear he would feel if Mike were alive, nor the relief, guilt, and sorrow he would feel if Mike had been killed.

He and Diana turned when the doors parted again, revealing two guards and Mike Donovan. Martin moved back to allow them to pass, and watched impassively as the human was shoved into the chair and restraints applied to his wrists. Martin had no time to reflect on what had gone wrong. He had to concentrate on getting himself and the human out of this room alive. The guards retreated to their posts by the door, and Martin stepped into the alcove, ready for anything to happen.

Mike showed good sense and avoided looking at Martin, settling instead for directing acidic glares towards Diana. He was sweaty, and gasping for air. Martin couldn’t tell if it was a response to fear, if it was because the human was still wearing a warm jacket, of perhaps a combination of the two. Kim had told him she found the ship to be uncomfortably warm, and probably the same was true for Mike.

After observing her prisoner’s response to being restrained, Diana stepped into the alcove. “Do you believe in truth, Mr. Donovan?”

Mike got cocky, trying to act more brave than he felt. “Well, it depends on who I hear it from.”

Diana injected him with the truth serum and waited a moment for it to take effect. “What color is your hair?” Diana asked.

“Blue.” Donovan grinned at her. Her truth serum didn’t work.

Martin wanted to smack him. He should have told the truth after one dose, then lied about the answers to subsequent questions. All he had done was earn himself another injection! His right hand clenched into a fist. 

“Really?” Diana grabbed a fistful of hair and jerked Donovan’s head to the side, exposing his neck. She injected him a second time, then retreated, pacing in front of the alcove. “What color is your hair, Mr. Donovan?”

Mike tried to hold back the words. Involuntarily, the word slipped out: “Brown.” He gasped, and then heard himself repeat the word.

Diana raked her fingers through his hair, gloating at her success. “Yes, a lovely shade of brown. Tell me, Mr. Donovan. The fifth column. You know some of them. Who is your contact?”

Mike fought to stay silent, straining against the bonds. If he could just concentrate on his breathing, maybe he could resist.

Diana repeated the question, more forcefully this time. “Who is your contact?”

Mike’s eyes darted around the room, looking for an escape. His gaze fell on Martin. Green eyes stared back at him, willing him to stay silent. He tried. But the name slipped out. “Martin.”

Diana whirled and stared at Martin in shock. Was the truth serum working? Her guards didn’t ponder such questions. One of them fired at Martin and missed. He crumpled to the floor before he got a second chance. Martin took out the second guard, too, then ran to the door, hoping to catch Diana, who had fled after the first shot. He fired after her, but she disappeared around a bend in the corridor. 

He darted back to Mike and released the wrist restraints. The human swayed on his feet, and Martin half dragged him to the ventilation duct. “This is our way out,” Martin explained, then gave Mike a boost inside before climbing up behind him.

* * * *

Martin kept Mike moving, hoping that activity would help speed the elimination of the drug by his system. But being unfamiliar with human biology, for all he knew his efforts could be only making the drug more effective.

“We have to get out of here,” Mike mumbled, stumbling.

“I know that,” Martin snapped, then immediately felt guilty. Mike was a rare friend among the humans. It wasn’t fair to blame him for what had happened. Martin knew he had been fortunate to remain on board for as long as he had.

Once they were safely away from the interrogation room, Martin's thoughts turned to planning their escape. The faster they got off the ship, the better their chances were. They had only a short time in which to reach a shuttle, or they were in serious trouble. For the next few minutes, he might even be accepted as a commanding officer and not a traitor. Once Diana had mobilized everyone and sounded the alarms, escape would be next to impossible.

Ignoring the human's mumbled complaints, Martin half-dragged, half-carried Donovan through the ventilation system, heading towards a shuttle bay. They had almost reached their destination when Martin heard the alarm sound. He left Mike for a moment and ventured quietly ahead. Peering thorough the grate covering the vent, he saw the security teams moving into position. Escape via shuttle was no longer an option.

He went back to Mike, who finally seemed to be regaining some control of himself.

“We're trapped, aren't we?” Mike tried to make his eyes focus. Right now, he could see three overlapping images of Martin kneeling in front of him.

“For the moment. They have the shuttle bays secured. Right now, we need to get as deep inside the ship as we can. Diana won't expect us to go further in.”

“Why not? She'll figure out we're still here.”

“I know how she thinks. Pamela might be a problem, but not Diana. This way.” He pulled Mike to his feet and led the way into the heart of the mothership.

* * * *

They didn’t get very far before exhaustion drained the last energy from Mike’s legs. 

“Come on, come on!” Martin coaxed, practically holding the human up on his feet. 

“I’ve gotta sit down, I’ve gotta sit down,” Mike pleaded, gasping for air.

“All right. But just for a minute.” Martin knelt next to Mike, keeping a hand under Mike’s chin to keep his head from lolling to the side. “The drugs are going to wear off soon.” He didn’t really know that, but hoped that it was true.

“How long are these tunnels?” Mike asked, fighting to think through the drug-induced haze that surrounded his mind.

“They are bigger than the New York subway system, but that’s not going to stop them from catching us if we don’t keep moving. Come on.” 

“Martin.”

Martin had started to prod the human to his feet, but paused when Mike spoke his name. “Huh?” 

“I’m sorry I couldn’t keep my mouth shut back there. I really fixed it for you.”

“It’s not your fault. It was just a matter of time,” Martin told him, then hauled Mike to his feet as they resumed their trek into the heart of the ship.

* * * *

 “Wait here,” Martin directed, letting Mike sink to the floor of the ventilation duct. Alone, he scouted ahead and checked their location based on the view from a grate. It opened into one of the water storage chambers in the hold. The air was cooler in this part of the ship, which he hoped would make Mike more comfortable. No guards were in sight, and the cameras were all directed towards monitoring the doors. This would provide them with a temporary haven while they waited for the drugs to wear off.

Satisfied, Martin returned to his friend and pulled Mike’s arm across his shoulders. “Just a little bit further, and then you can rest.”

“Where are we?” Mike asked groggily as he watched Martin open the grate.

“Someplace you’ve been before,” Martin answered. He jumped down to the floor, then reached up to help Mike climb down. “You should find the temperature in here more agreeable.”

Mike nodded. “I'm beginning to appreciate how big this ship is.” He was out of shape and out of energy. Looking around, Donovan was once again amazed at the volume of liquid stored here. Gawking at everything, he followed Martin to a water tank far from the main entrance.

“What if someone comes in?” he whispered.

“They shouldn't. All of these tanks are full. However, there are several ways to make a quick exit,” Martin told him, and pointed them out as he led them through the myriad of storage tanks.

“How long can we stay here?” Donovan asked after they had both drunk their fill of the water.

“Not long. But it's a safe place to stop and rest while the drugs wear off. Can you tolerate the temperature?” Martin asked as he sat down and leaned against a pipe, then closed his eyes.

“Better than I can tolerate Diana catching us.” He looked at Martin and suddenly realized that the fifth columnist was really exhausted. He hadn't noticed it before. “Are you all rig